Being A Mom Is Fulltime Job
The worst part? There are no parenting classes that really train us how to be good at our jobs. We get tons of parenting advice, but which one do you take?
Unlike going to work, moms (parents) do not seem to know how to shut off. Going to a workplace, means that you get to leave it; while working as a stay at home parent does not give you that “5:00pm – I’m off the clock” licence.
The Pinterest Plague
In addition to this, we have also been hit by the Pinterest Plague – the bonus of being guilted us into going that extra ten miles for our children. From fancy arts and crafts, bento lunch boxes, and DIY decor – the list goes on and on.
I’ll admit it. I fell for it. I spent hours and days doing “most pinned” activities with my children. I tried to make amazing breakfasts and cute lunches with love notes, jokes, and daily facts tucked in for a lunchtime surprise. I also fell into the DIY decor trend, making homemade birthday bunting and pompoms, canvas artwork, and upcycled furniture.
This new phenomenon has taken over our lives. Upcycled as a word is not even recognised on spellcheck yet. It began in the 1990’s and suddenly took off in about 2010-2011 – leaving the less crafty and time poor parents behind.
When I fell into this, I was working full time in a stressful and demanding corporate role. I would rush home, try and cook a meal that wasn’t always spaghetti Bolognese. On the weekends, I would try and keep my daughters busy with face painting, canvas art, and baking. I would also try and save money by going to the local op shops to find furniture to “upcycle”. Never mind that I ended paying more in material; when I could have saved heaps buying something clean, generic, and ALREADY MADE UP from Kmart.
Looking back, I feel like a numpty. Hindsight is like that though isn’t it? Always 20/20.
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Resigning from the Mom Hustle
After I broke down, I decided to look after myself more. I decided I was resigning from the Mum Hustle.
No longer was I going to try and fill the children’s time with preplanned activities. I put my oven mitts down and the mixer back up in the cupboard. I stopped visiting op shops to look for hidden treasures. I decided, I was going to be me first – and then whatever else after that.
When I did this, things began to change.
10 Things I Learned When I Resigned from Mom Hustling:
10. Life goes on. Whether you are busy doing some crafty activity or watching Despicable Me; life goes on. Don’t waste it by doing things you don’t necessarily enjoy.
9. My cooking is fabulous. Everyone loves my spaghetti Bolognese – and chances are, everyone loves your go to dish. Cooking should not be a chore. You are feeding the bellies of your loved ones… do it gently, and do it with love. Their bellies will thank you for it.
My cooking is so fabulous even the smoke alarm cheers me on!
8. There are tons of things to do that don’t require Pinterest. Don’t get me wrong – I still love Pinterest; and I’m on it every day. What I no longer do however, is refer to it for ideas of what to do with my kids. Children have amazing imaginations and you should let them thrive and use it. Think back on when you were younger… did your parent spend every waking moment with you doing fancy activities? I’m guessing you’ll say, “no”. And guess what? You turned out alright – and they will too.
7. You will love yourself more. When I stopped running around like a headless chicken, I began to enjoy life a whole lot more. On the other side of that scale, I think the children love me more for it too. People can feel your energy. It’s either you emit good energy or you’re difficult to be around. Which one are you?
6 . Staying home should not feel like a punishment. By keeping my children super involved in activities, I inadvertently taught them that staying at home was a bad thing. It meant that there was nothing to do and nothing to see. So not true! Help them to unlearn this and instead teach them that home is beautiful place.
5. Your children have lots of stories to tell. When there is less of a fuss made on things to do, the stories come out. Miss 12 now tells me about things that are happening in school; and Miss 9 talks about her research findings. “Did you know that male cats are called Toms, and females cats are called Queens?” No, I did not know that. Because less time is spent following instructions, packing day gear etc… there is more time for chatting. You’ll be amazed at what you children have to say.
4. Silence is golden. Whilst I love hearing the children’s stories, I have also learned how to appreciate the silence. I think my kids have as well. They can spend time on their own, entertaining themselves and doing their own things.
3. Your children will still love you. Somehow, we’ve taught ourselves to always be on “go” mode all the time. Pressing the stop (or pause) button and spending more quality time together has made me see how much my children actually love me – whether we do fancy things or not. It’s cheesy right? But it’s so true.
2. You are number one. Look after yourself, and remember that you are number one. We’ve all heard it before right? Happy moms raise happy kids. So take that much needed “me time” and enjoy it.
1. Parenting is the most ridiculously difficult, but beautiful, task you will ever have. Enough said ♥
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