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Is Your Marriage Working?
It is likely that you are reading this because you are 1 – unhappy in your marriage, 2 – thinking about a separation, or 3 – you have been through it.
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Every marriage is different. Each has its own ups and downs. Couples argue and disagree on a number of varied reasons. This is all true. However it is also true that every relationship must have some basic fundamentals to survive.
10 Signs Your Marriage Needs Some Work
1. You no longer communicate. Communication is a big part of every marriage (or any relationship, for that matter). Proper communication between couples allows you to see and appreciate your partner in various ways – whether they are excited, sad and vulnerable, or even angry about something that may have happened. Couples should be real partners – allies. Once you stop communicating, it’s difficult to try and round this back up without trying to make a conscious effort.
2. You don’t laugh together. I know this sounds trivial, but it’s simple. If you don’t laugh together, this can only mean that you no longer have anything in common. Remember the cliche that laughter is the best medicine? Well there you go.
3. Everything your partner does or says, irritates you. This happens to the best of us from time to time. But if you find that this is what you are feeling every single day, then you need to look closer into this before it is too late.
4. You don’t go out and spend time together. I know that you hear this all the time. People talk about date nights, sneaky getaways, or even a nice, quite staycation. Is it really such a big deal? The same way the we crave for time to ourselves… relationships are the same. This is often forgotten – especially when you have little children in the picture. You’ve got to set some time aside for your relationship – whether it’s one night a week, a bike ride on the weekend… just the two of you, or a dinner date. Invest in your relationship, because it matters.
5. You feel unsupported and unappreciated. Sometimes, life can get so overwhelmingly busy, that we forget to show our partners that we appreciate them. I used to find myself, after working a full day, alone in the kitchen at night, doing the dishes or hanging the washing, while I could hear my ex husband watching TV or playing some video game. It’s an awful feeling; and if it continues, the feeling gets stronger and stronger.
6. You don’t have sex… or you have sex simply to satisfy a need. Does your partner try to cozy up to you, and you find yourself pretending to be asleep or busy doing something else? Are you revolted by the thought of your skin touching theirs? Sex is a beautiful expression of love. Women need to feel connected before having sex; while men need sex to feel connected. It’s a balancing act – literally and figuratively!
7. You don’t respect your partner. Do you interrupt your spouse and belittle their ideas? Do you make fun of them in front of your friends? Do you feel that your partner is ashamed of you? Respect comes in many forms. Whichever form it is taking place in your relationship, you will know it because it doesn’t feel nice and slowly eats away at you.
8. Their opinion no longer matters. Do you remember when you and your partner used to check in with each other before doing something? When your opinion, or that of your partner, no longer matters; another slice of the respect for each other is taken away.
“When your opinion, or that of your partner, no longer matters; another slice of the respect for each other is taken away.”
9. You cannot think of anything nice to say about your partner. Have you stopped gushing about how great your partner is? If your mum or your best friend asks how your spouse is, do you have only negative things to say? Relationships like this are not healthy. If there is something about your partner that is troubling you, you need to be talking to them about it…. and not talking about them to others.
10. You dream about something (or someone) better… or even long to be on your own. I think this is pretty clear.
- 15 Signs of Emotional Abuse and Control in Relationships
- How To Support Your Children When Your Separation Is Not Amicable
- How To Be Happy: 3 Simple Secrets
No Relationship Is An Easy One
So if yours is important to you, then work on it. But this should go both ways. Remember to always look after yourself, and do what is right for you. Ask yourself… if my daughter or my son were in this situation – what advice would I give them? Then go and do that.
Ask yourself: “If my daughter or my son were in this situation – what advice would I give them?” Then go and do that.
Go Deeper: Resources to Strengthen Your Marriage
These are great reads for anyone wanting to strengthen their marriage or relationships.
- 47 Little Love Boosters for a Happy Marriage: Connect and Instantly Deepen Your Bond No Matter How Busy You Are
- The 4 Seasons of Marriage: Secrets to a Lasting Marriage
Get the FREE Love Yourself Challenge HERE, or click on the image below!